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36 and Living Wild

So, this is the moment where I begin writing this... the beginning of a book (Even just typing that - a huge chill of weird excitement and anxiety hits me). I think I have always thought to myself - “oh, I dont, have the right computer - or I could never ACTUALLY do that - I didn’t go to school for English - essentially just continually coming up with one excuse after another to not start this first book. The direction it will lead at this very moment - I am not exactly sure - but I do know I have had 3 recurring dreams in my head over the last 5 - 6 years: that I am meant to write these things, these experiences here, and tell a story, my story - the stories that make up my story, because they have created invaluable experiences, lessons and life changes that have created me into the continuously better person I that I am and the better person that I can be - and I believe that these types of experiences and lessons can get anyone and everyone to see their true potential and the tremendous impact they can have on this Earth, this Universe, if they could only begin experiences, for themselves, some of the things I have done. I know a lot of what I have done has to do with the fact that I am a white woman coming from middle class America of the Midwest - but please believe - I have never had a trust fund, had a multi-thousand dollar van, or an instagram influencer following - I’ve just been doing it - choosing the fucking path less traveled since goddamn 2009, when I was a 5th year senior at Ball State University and decided to accept an unpaid internship in NYC over a coveted paid internship at the children’s hospital my mother had worked at for 30+ years. I chose to do the uncomfortable thing, not because I choose to be uncomfortable, but because I had dared to dream. It’s funny, because here I am sitting in my 2007 CRV (Greta), that I have been living in for the past 2 months at the age of 36 while attempting to work one last season at an organization that unhealthfully used to be my whole identity, Outward Bound, before hanging up my hat to fully focus on me - and my business - and deciding whether or not to stay in this recreation industry world - one that can be absolutely impossible to not give up in - heck, just today I was throwing around the idea with friends saying I should just get a fucking corporate 9-5pm and call it quits. It’s so hard and so impossible to be doing something that you feel is so right to do that you would work 3 jobs in one day: cleaning hostel cabins, driving a school bus to take people river tubing and washing dishes at a fancy cocktail bar where the 26 year old “boss” flexes his oh-so-fragile toxic male ego on her because he in some way feels threatened by her - probably saw my resume as he is the manager. (side story: tonight he micro-managed me about how I pushed chairs into their tables outside. He admittedly came in saying how “fucking pissed he is” and that he had just punched a wall and broke part of his metatarsal. He later admitted that it was about his sister - my awareness of the story ends there - but either way, it just reminded me of how much work the male species needs as a whole - it was weird to realize that what I once would have been furious about, I now have an “oh that sucks you’re still not taking care of yourself in the right way,” view on it - and I guess that’s what ya call, "growth," - something very cool to realize almost in the moment of the story/experience). Okay, back to the main story - All of this is to say that I am passionate about what I do and what I want to continue to do - which is to get more women and girls in the outdoors to realize their power! To reteach them how to take back the power that has ALWAYS existed within by doing things they never imagined doing and succeeding. That is why this company all “really” started in September of 2022(I say really because i have invested so much into it and so have others that it actually ‘feels’ real - but weird how it took the monetary side of things for me to actually believe in it - more of a fun financial wellness question to unpack in the future that’s tied up in my sometimes lack of self-efficacy). I believe I have something to offer women, girls and non-binary people that can help them discover something inside of themselves that they never knew existed. I believe these outdoor experiences can push you to continue to do the "wild," thing or the hard thing. They can push you to do things that will grow who you are as a person and allow your compassion for other living things to expand infinitely. I am here to help reteach you all how to live your most powerful, mindful and compassionate lives all through adventures in the outdoors. More stories, tips, tricks and etc from my Wild life at 36, to come. :)

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